My mother and I used to argue about the practice of living together before marriage. I was firmly for it and my mother was firmly against it.
She would quote these out-of-date statistics about how living together before marriage leads to divorce. I would counter that living together doesn’t lead to divorce, getting married for the wrong reasons, being unwilling to compromise and being selfish leads to divorce. Plus, living together and divorce are acceptable in today’s society so the chances that couples would live together and then get divorced are much higher than 30 years ago when my parents go married. Of course, that’s just my opinion.
I always said you never truly knew a person until you lived with them. Chuck had his own place when we started dating so I was fully aware that he hated doing dishes, left a trail of boxers and socks all over the floor and glasses could be found scattered around the apartment.
While I was prepared I was unaware as to how I would react to it.
It’s friggen’ annoying is what it is.
Yesterday I asked him to unload and reload the dishwasher. When I returned home 10 minutes before him, neither were done.
He apologized and I was over it. The next day, the clean dishes were replaced with dirty ones, and I was happy.
Are his dirty man habits a deal-breaker? Absolutely not. I have some dirty girl habits myself. Strands of my hair can be found throughout the bathroom and there’s still a glass of wine from yesterday sitting on my desk. In the things that matter, he’s been great.
Sure, in the time that we’re together, I’ll still learn a lot about him, but I think most of the skeletons are out of the closet at this point. That might not be the case for other engaged couples.
It sounds harsh to say that living together before marriage is the same as test driving a car or trying on a pair of jeans before you buy them, but in the grand scheme of things isn’t it just that? Aren’t you just taking marriage out for a test drive?
Regardless of what you believe, in my opinion, it’s better to hash out the hard stuff now before the papers are signed than after. It’s a lot cheaper and involve a lot less heartache
For more stories about annoying husbands, visit this great blog: My Husband is Annoying. I’ll admit that the inspiration from this post came from the writings in this blog…and bag of garbage still waiting to be taken to the dumpster.